Tuesday, May 30, 2017

how do you not tick?

Dating is so hard. How do you stop yourself from obsessing over someone, if he's telling the truth, if he's bullshitting you, if tells you he's not seeing other people but you know he is? How do you stop your brain from telling all these bad things? One time I lost my shit on this guy I'm currently seeing and he immediately pulled the crazy card on me. And he didn't seem like the type to call a girl crazy. So I must've acted like complete nutjob that time. I'm trying so hard. I really am. But it's so hard to fully give yourself to someone when 90% of you know that it will end in the gutter. That you just end up as this awful obsessive blob of a human being instead of the funny, affectionate and intelligent woman that you really are. I'd fall in love with me. Easily. But sometimes.. you know. Everything sucks.

S: I'm just preparing you for reality
me: I'm the most prepared for reality! Ilang reality na yung napagdaanan ko! Minsan lang masarap isipin na hindi ka niloloko. 

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